Two months since the stroke. Two months since I last heard Jim speak to me. Two months since I last heard his music coming from this studio. It's much too quiet here now.
One of the things I really loved about my life with Jim was hearing him play here at home. I'd be in the house doing dishes or working out in the yard and I'd hear him out here playing. I always felt so lucky to have that.
His last day was a good one. He'd had that great gig the night before with Dave Hocket's band. He was puttering around just doing this and that, having a pleasant day. I was having back trouble. One of the last things he did that day was give me a nice, long back massage with the electric massager. We had such a nice conversation. He seemed so happy. Right after that he went back out to the studio. Maybe 15 minuted later Lindsay came to tell me he looked like he was falling asleep in front of the computer. That was it.
Two months ago it was cold and windy. I remember thinking it was too bad he had to go through this while the weather was so shitty. Not a logical thought at all but at that time so many of my thoughts didn't make any sense.
Now it's warm and sunny. I have flowers planted everywhere. Every morning I go out with my cup of coffee and sit with the kitties and look at my pitty wowies (Lindsay's word for flowers when she was little) and enjoy the sunshine.
There's still so much to do. I'm glad that the weather is nice now. I don't like working in the cold and so much of what needs to be done involves working in the apartment out back or in the storage trailer. And then there's all that other stuff like paperwork and getting the cars squared away. I still have too many piles of "issues". I need to make a master list and stick it on the fridge so things don't fall through the cracks. So, ok, I'll do that. I need to keep moving forward so I don't get stuck in overwhelm.
Hmm, right now I don't have something fun to look forward to. No more Trucker shows for now. Yes, I must find a show or a concert or something. Who's on tour? Gotta get out of town, even if it's just for an evening.
12 comments:
Next year. I am so there.
I'd give anything to sit in the sun and look at pitty wowies- we're getting 9-12" of snow for my birthday Sat.!
I think you're doing a great job keeping everything in a forward direction- I'm sure it's incredibly hard and sad. We think about you every day! Keep on (naked?) truckin'
I wish our town had things to do, but we don't. If I think of anything good, I'll post it or send it to you.
I remember a post by Jim about pitty wowies back a few months ago. I am happy that the weather is so sweet right now, it's a good mellow time in the middle of winter.
Nancy, not anonymous here...
Two months. wow. Time still marches on, I guess; even though it seems like it shouldn't.
Hey, I know L.A. is not the closest airport to you, but Horizon just started a new prop plane service from Sonoma Co. to L.A. and Seattle. The introductory L.A. fare is $69 each way!
You are more than welcome to come visit here any old time.
We need to plan our summer, thing, too.
Nancy- Ooh, I wonder how much it is to Seattle. $69 to Sonoma County airport! That is a very doable weekend. Lindsay's best friends, Chelsey and David are getting married on June 16th. Maybe we'll fly up for it.
Since you're getting your summer planned are you available some weekend in July? I was thinking we could have the Jim party then. Paige doesn't get out of school until late June. Will July work for you?
Anne- Happy Birthday! I hope you guys can dig yourselves out of the snow and go do something fun.
Virginia- Yeah, things are a little dull in ol' Riverside. If I can't find an LA show I may just take myself out for a movie or something this weekend. I'm BORED.
It's impossible to think of it being the middle of winter. When the first day of spring comes we'll all be going yeah, ok, whatever...
If I do anything this weekend I'll call you and see if you want to do it too. But if the last 30 weekends are any indication of the current weekend I'll be sitting my ass at home, or maybe I'll actually clean something. ick.
So, come over. We'll yap. We can have a nice lunch in honor of Anne's birthday.
OK, so while I'm here in NY digging out from this #$*&%##$ blizzard on my birthday, the two of you will be having a nice sunny warm lunch????? What's wrong with this picture???
No, no, it's ok because we'll be toasting you. We'll talk about you, too. Tell you what, we'll take a picture and sent it to you.
Yeah, yeah, we will! It'll be like a long distance birthday party!
I think it's $120 each way to Seattle.
http://www1.pressdemocrat.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070316/NEWS/703160382/1036/BUSINESS01
I was thinking July for Jim's party, too, but we still have to discuss it. We'll try to nail that soon.
Sounds good.
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