Dede and David visited this weekend. They've taken over Dad's finances (Oh, thank you!) and now they're coming down once a month to handle bills and whatever. David was impressed with how much better Dad is doing. He showed me a couple pages from Dad's checkbook. Last month's page was scrawled all over and there were many errors. This month's page wasn't error free but it was much neater, like Dad is having less trouble writing. David said Dad seems more confident. I've noticed a change, too.
While this is all positive and wonderful, Dad still has Alzheimer's and can't seem to process new information well. He can't get it into his head that continuing to farm Christmas trees is dragging him down. If he let them all die he'd be better off financially. He looks at them growing out there and sees dollar signs. But then David showed Dad the numbers and had him mostly convinced.
Dad and David called Bud Lyon to see if he would be interested in leasing the land and continue growing trees. That's basically what Bud Lyon does. He has leased farm land all over Southern California. Well, Bud has colon cancer and isn't doing all that well. He told Dad that if he'd contacted him 3 years ago he'd have done it. He told Dad he'd think about it.
Well, in Dad's mind it's a done deal. He thinks Bud is going to take the whole thing over. David and Dede explained to him over and over and over that no, that probably won't happen and he really can't afford to take the farm through another tree season. They left feeling like that message didn't sink in. David is going to call Bud and fill him in on the situation.
So, we're all going to have to keep telling Dad he has to shut down the tree business. I think we're going to have a hard time convincing him. Now that he's feeling better he's gotten cocky.
It's interesting that he's gotten so much better. He stopped taking Aracept because it caused him some stomach pain. His blood sugar is mostly under control and he's been exercising. He's been better about taking his other medication and the vitamins. It's those vitamins I'm wondering about. Maybe the curcumin and all that other stuff is kicking in.
It could also be that he's had time to adjust to the idea that he's got a problem. I think it's probably a combination of everything we've all been doing. There really has been a noticeable change in him. Still, this ain't no cure and he still can't handle his life.
We'll take what we can get.
4 comments:
I wonder how much of the selective hearing is Alzheimers? My MIL certainly has it and she doesn't have Alzheimers. At the docs she hears one thing, I hear another. In terms of her finances, she hears us when we talk to her about credits and debits to her cash and she nods her head and then sits back and does nothing at all.
Virginia- With Dad I think the selective hearing has to do with his level of denial about his condition. He latches onto these unrealistic scenarios like they're actually going to happen. Maybe Jean is also in denial that way. They think somehow it will all work out, Meanwhile we kids are the ones tearing our hair out handling their affairs and trying to make them understand the reality of the situation.
They're evil, aren't they? They're the ones in control and they know it and they know there's nothing we can do about it. Those gol-durned old people.
Dean- Wow. Well, speaking from experience I know how stress can screw up your thinking. As I remember it, Greg's mom was sick for a while before she died and she didn't go easy, right? So he was dealing with all that stress and then the grief when she died. It's good to know that even at that age we can bounce back.
The last few months I have felt like I lost some IQ points. I got dumber. Now I feel pretty together. Just don't ask me to do long division.
yeah, my MIL is in denial about her condition. Up until she was forced to get in-home care, she thought she was living independently. She didn't think too much about Jeff bringing in her groceries every week, me taking her to the doc and hairdressers, etc. I think she thinks of it as us doing her favors instead of her relying on us. She thinks everything she asks us to do takes only a few minutes, rather than the hours it actually does. Total denial of her dependence but totally aware of her power over her ability to make her kids dance to her tune.
I hope I'm easier on my own kids.
ME TOO!!!!
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