That's how long we sat here with Dad explaining how to do his diabetes testing and talking in circles about what we need to do to sell his land.
He absolutely cannot do his own diabetes testing anymore. I wish we could have filmed this session because it was amazing. He couldn't understand why it's so difficult to do now when it was so easy a few weeks ago. We told him (as gently as we could) that he can expect it to be this way from now on. So starting tomorrow morning we're going to do all of his testing. I'm going to go over there every day at 8am and do his fasting test. Then I'll test him 2 hours after meals.
He wanted to get his meds from me. He had a bit of a fight about it, nothing big. I agreed to let him have one of the meds because he's incorporated it into his routine and it's going to run out soon anyway.
We need to set up a little meeting to discuss what the next step will be to sell his land. He has it in his mind that Scotty's friend, Patrick, is going to handle the whole thing. We have to get it cleared up soon and sign up with a realtor. He keeps getting cold calls and he has one woman mailing him comps. We need to get things locked in so we can get rid of all these other people. Dad thinks he's going to get a realtor to give him money up front. We went round and round trying to get him to understand that that's not the way it works. After a while we gave up.
Jim is a saint. That was an exhausting session.
7 comments:
You all better think about getting power of attorney soon...while he still has some lucid time left. Otherwise you'll have to go thru the courts and let me tell you about that!
Comps on houses! She sent him comps on HOUSES that have recently sold in this area. She doesn't even know that it's land that's for sale, not a house. I'm going to go over there and get the package she sent and call her and tell her she's dealing with a man who has Alzheimer's. I'm going to tell her to stop calling him or I'm gonna sick the law on her.
We already have power of attorney but I'm not sure how it kicks in with Alzheimer's patients. How far gone does he have to be before we can just step in? I think that as time goes on he'll be more and more willing to give up control. He'll still fight a bit but I think he knows he's losing the battle.
We need to have a family meeting with David and Dede there. Things are changing and we need to have a plan of action.
What kind of power of attorney? You may be able to use it now, he can't make decisions on his meds, so it's probably safe to say he can't make decisions on his financial needs either.
You should think about screening his mail. Take out all mail that has a RE name on it. If the property is listed you'll get more and more inquiries on it. If he has an RE agent, you should let them know you have power of attorney and all future correspondence go directly to you.
I believe we have it for both the financial stuff and the medical stuff. I'm sot sure how it all works.
It's not so much about him not being able to make his own decisions, it's more about what he's able to do. He's still with it enough to have control over his own life. If we tried to move in too soon with power of attorney he'd be sooooo majorly pissed. It's too soon for that. But every thing is in place (as far as I know).
I screen his mail when I get the opportunity. Most of the time the woman who lives behind us gets it and delivers it to him. But I don't think this is going to be a problem much longer. We (my sibs) are going to get together on this and fix the problem. Plus, Dad seems to be slipping at a fairly fast rate. I think pretty soon reading any of his mail will be too much for him.
All us Lang kids work pretty well together. So far we've all agreed on every issue concerning Dad that we've ever discussed. We're so freakin' rational. Plus, we have our own doctor in the family. David, if we didn't have you all this would be twice as hard to deal with. You have no idea how much we appreciate you.
Anyway, I'm certain that power of attorney will happen exactly when it needs to.
This morning Jim and I went over there to do his blood test. The first result was 333. He tested again and came up with 260, still too high.
He wondered why the numbers were so high. I told him it's probably because he's not exercising and not managing his diet and his meds. There have been times when I've asked him about taking his meds and sometimes he'll say it's been a couple days since he took anything. I told him this and he accused me of making things up. That's the Alzheimer's talking.
He's going to call us after he gets back from breakfast so we can do the next test. He needs to stop eating in restaurants so much. I need to take him to Costco and the grocery store and get him stocked up on easy to prepare foods. That'll take care of the diet but it will make his day more dull. Getting out to a restaurant where he can flirt with a waitress (or bug the hell out of a waitress) is a big part of his day.
We went to breakfast at Coco's the other day. I noticed that the waitress was being kind of short with him. He eats there almost every day so I know they know him. I managed to sneak away and pull her aside. I told her he has Alzheimer's and that he can be difficult sometimes. She was relieved to find out. She said sometimes when there's a long wait he'll just find a table and seat himself, going ahead of all the people waiting to be seated. Typical Dad. The king must eat.
Therein lies the quandry: what they can do and what decisions they can make with sound mind.
All of us are in the same boat in that we don't want our parents to become majorly pissed at us.
Hell, I don't care if he's pissed at me. I just want him to cooperate and if he's mad cooperation goes out the window.
Oh it's going to be quite a party from here on out.
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