Today we went to the VA emergency room because Dad's elbow has flared up somethin' awful. He had an appointment with Dr. Griffin for Monday but the pain and swelling are too bad for him to wait. After futzing around in the ER for half an hour they sent us to Dr. Griffin. She drained a little fluid from the elbow that she sent off for testing. The swelling is mostly from inflammation, not excess fluid. She sent us home with an antibiotic (the same one he OD'd on some months back), something for inflammation and some Vicodin. I was concerned about Dad having these new meds and asked her if I should keep them at my house. She said I should have ALL of Dad's meds at my house, in fact she insisted on it. I came up with a compromise. I'll keep the new meds at my house and dole them out and monitor the meds he already has.
She pulled me out into the hall for a chat. She said she thinks he's slipping and we have to be very careful about keeping his diabetes under control and keeping him on track with his meds. She said if David wants to call her she'd be very happy to talk to him.
I thought Dad would be pissed about her and I leaving the room for a chat but he seemed fine with it. He also didn't mind me taking the new meds home. He's been very friendly and cooperative this last week. I think on some level he knows that he's slipping so he's willing to accept more help and give up some control.
He's definitely more foggy now. I have to explain things over and over. And then five minutes later I have to explain it all again. I worry about his driving. He eats all of his meals in restaurants which is probably the reason he's gained so much weight. I wonder if we're getting close to the point where he needs round the clock care. Calling him to ask if he's taken his meds just doesn't cut it.
So, ok.
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I think it'll be a while before he'll accept any outside help. I think he'll have to be pretty far gone before that happens. Once his land is sold he'll have enough money to pay a professional.
It's like we're in a constant state of transition. I knew this was coming. I've been kind of enjoying his independence even though he's been mean and not taking care of himself very well. This morning he came over to get his dose and he was jovial. Maybe he'll be more willing to relinquish control.
He sure has been easy to get along with lately. Even when I've had to get a little tough with him he didn't fight back. The other night I was asking him about his pain medication and he said he didn't know how much he had taken. I told him if he doesn't keep track of this stuff he won't be able to live independently and he'll lose control over his own life. He didn't get positional with me, which until recently would have been his automatic reaction. I just gotta wonder how long this cooperative phase will last.
Living in the state of transition is not as good as living out of that state. My convoluted wisdom for today.
My sister lives out of state. Does that count?
Convoluted, yes.
Well stated.
I'll bet ya she's glad she's in that state and not in the state we're in.
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