Last night I read over my earliest entries, especially the ones after Dad was diagnosed with AD. Hoo-wee, we've been through a lot! And we're not even into the nitty gritty of Alzheimer's yet. These days Dad is actually doing better than he was a year ago. Medication, I guess. Still, there's nothing that can give me that sinking feeling in my chest like a hard day with Dad.
We're kind of in limbo here. We don't know for sure how long we'll be here on the farm. We don't have any idea at all where we'll live after we leave here. We'll stay in Riverside until after Paige graduates but if the land sale is complete before then we'll need to find a house to rent where we can have our 3 cats and 2 dogs. And then what? Where will we go?
This is the thing that makes me feel like I'm staring into a deep, black hole. Eventually we'll get it figured out and I doubt we'll end up pushing a cart, but for now it pretty much sucks to try to plan for the future.
But I do have some things to look forward to. It's looking pretty good for the band. I'm optimistic about our new drummer. It will be fun to start getting some gigs around town.
I'm really looking forward to getting into some real work on the Live TV's Kyle Show. Jim's been working on transcribing some songs and I've been studying the vocals. I'm going to try adding in some ukulele on some songs. The guys in the band are enthusiastic about the show. Lindsay says Kyle is excited about it. I'm glad because at first I felt like I was railroading him into it.
Dean's coming on Friday! Her visit will be theraputic for both of us. It's good for her and I to get a dose of each other at least once a year.
Open mike is next Sunday. Kyle, wanna do a song?
So, even though I have a cloud of uncertainty hanging over me I try to stay positive. Doing fun stuff helps, meditation class helps, exercise helps a LOT. This blog really, really, REALLY helps. Between this and the weight loss blog I get to talk to some wonderful people. Thanks, you guys!
6 comments:
(brushes away a wee tear) Thank you. Wow.
I owe you a lot, too. You've always made me feel smarter just being with you. That's significant since I grew up thinking I was dumb (thanks, Dad).
You grok me too. I can be completely myself with you. I don't have to edit myself or worry that you'll take something the wrong way. Nobody makes me laugh like you do. That's one reason I so look forward to our visits. I get a lot of mileage out of a week spent with Dean. Dammit, I sure do wish we lived in the same town!
Oh, please! Anyone who knows me knows I'm tough as nails.
Heyyyy, is Dean going to be here for Sun at Claremont? I would love to meet you Dean. I don't always go to the Claremont thing but I'd go if I got to meet you.
zqiqaeem: Highest order of royalty for all tse-tse flies.
Yes, Dean will be here for open mike. We could do the dinner thing beforehand.
I still don't know what we're going to perform.
Yep, Jeff's SIL, wife of BillyCanary, Mom of Liam...related to all the Canaries (who sing at Clarmont) that sometimes Donita and Jim make comments about in this blog. You'll probably get to see those three sing if you're at Open Mike.
Dinner sounds fun. This month the OM is starting earlier?
Ooh, I don't know. Better check.
jckcczj- This one wants to be a palindrome but it just can't cut it.
Post a Comment